It Was Meant To Be
by E. Feather
Summary: A songfic based on Brandy's "Have You Ever". It's Jilia and Jowy's love story through both their POVs. My first try at a Suiko fic. Plz comment, thks!


**It Was Meant To Be**

Author's Notes: Firstly, I do not own any of the characters in this fanfiction. They belong to Konami's Genso Suikoden 2.

Next, this is a songfic based on Brandy's hit, "Have You Ever".

I know there are many Jowy and Jilia fics out there and I won't make a difference, but I would just like to show that their love story was rather...tragic. Facts may not be right, no middle names seen, grammatical mistakes may exist, but hey, this is my own version of how this romance tale developed. They really shine! Thank you for your reviews and I've made some minor changes in this fic. Hopefully it's not so bad.

Btw, the Hero's name here is Riou.

_____________________________

_Have you ever loved somebody so much   
It makes you cry   
Have you ever needed something so bad   
You can't sleep at night   
Have you ever tried to find the words   
But they don't come out right   
Have you ever, have you ever   
  
Have you ever   
  
_

______________

Jilia sat there in front of the mirror, amazed at what she saw. She was wearing the most gorgeous wedding gown and her veil was being fitted onto her head, allowing her dark hair to flow along her back. Her make-up artist had done a wonderful job that even Jilia was surprised that she could look this nice. 

"A lady looks the most beautiful when she is happy. So it is true, for my lady is about to wed the man whom she loves as dearly as he loves her," said the hair stylist.

_The man I love…Yes, I do love him...I am happy...I AM happy..._ thought Jilia as she gazed at her 'happy' image on the mirror. Her arms spread out and thrashed everything on her table to the floor, startling the servants around her. _But he loves me not! He does not know how I feel for him! He does not care for me! He had no idea how much joy I felt when he asked for my hand, only to be crushed later on. This wedding is nothing but a political one...I am nothing but a pawn to him! After this ceremony he would probably never come and see me anymore..._

Jilia fell to the floor sobbing, her beautiful make-up melting like her heart. The servants around scuttled to pick things up. The make-up artist flustered. Never had they seen their future queen so broken-hearted before, not even when their late king passed away. They saw her grow up and she has always treated them as friends, not as lowlifes her brother would see them. Jilia had always been a soft and gentle-hearted girl. She deserved all the happiness in the world, yet it seemed fate had blocked it all out. Her mother's early death, Luca's hatred for her, her father's recent death, and they were so glad now that she finally could be happy. They thought that this wedding was a match made in heaven, that the princess wanted this, but looking at her weep like a fallen angel gave them doubts. The wedding was about to start and it seemed like they had to start over again. Should they cancel it? Prince Luca would be furious, but it seemed Princess Jilia could not even make it down the aisle.

As sudden as the emotions had come, they disappeared. Jilia now stood upright adjusting her gown and hair. She still looked perfect, except for the smudges on her face. She sat back on her chair only and waited. No one moved. She looked around,

"Could you please do my make-up for me again? And make haste, as we are lack of time."

The beautician moved closer. She picked up her tools and was about to start when she asked in concern,

"Are you certain, my lady?" 

Jilia smiled sadly, wiping a fresh tear from under her eye.

"Yes, Georla, I am certain that I will be happy, for I am going to marry the man I love."

______________

_Have you ever been in love   
Been in love so bad   
You'd do anything   
To make them understand   
Have you ever had someone   
Steal your heart away   
You'd give anything, oh   
To make them feel the same   
  
Have you ever search for words   
To get you in their heart   
But you don't know what to say   
And you don't know where to start_

______________

He watched her walk down the aisle, beautiful and poised. Today she looked remarkable. All white, she did look like an angel from heaven that had come to save him from the cruel world. Never once had she failed to surprise him, impress him. Each time they met, Jowy could feel his heart drawn a step closer to her. This was not a good sign, as she was only meant to be his tool to complete his plan, yet she was slowly occupying a larger space inside him. Shaking these thoughts away, Jowy smiled when their eyes met and she returned the smile, but was that of sadness he saw?

The priest droned on in the elaborate ceremony. Prince Luca was in a good mood that day. Not only was he able to receive another loyal dog, he could finally get rid of the responsibility of that wretched sister of his. However, these formalities were boring him. He wished to go out and hunt some pigs. Abruptly, he spoke,

"Save the formalities and get to the point!"

Everyone was startled by this outburst, but the priest practically cowered in fear. He composed himself and went straight to the question,

"Do you, Lord Jowy Atreides, take this woman as your loving wife?"

There was no need to think. Jowy had planned this for some time and in order for his plan to succeed, he must go through this. Besides, he felt that he would not regret marrying Jilia.

"Yes, I do."

"Do you, Princess Jilia Blight, take this man as your beloved husband?"

Jilia froze. She could still make her choice. She could still say no and probably be killed by her own brother, but she would at least be free. An odd silence followed. Jowy looked at Jilia questioningly. She saw those eyes; eyes, which once knew joy, had now been filled with sorrow and pain. She knew that she had made her choice the moment she saw those eyes, and it was from a long time ago. Jowy's determination lured her and his sorrow drew her near. She longed to be part of his life and heart. She would try her very best to sooth those eyes from its pain, even if it meant being a pawn. She smiled softly and said,

"Yes, I do."

______________

_Ooh   
Have you ever find someone   
You dreamt of all your life   
You'd do just about anything   
To look into their eyes   
Have you finally found the one   
You've given your heart to   
Only to find that one   
Won't give their heart to you_

______________

Jowy let out a soft sigh of relief. Was Jilia thinking of backing out just now? For a moment he panicked and felt her eyes search his, before her smile reached him and he found a second of peace. It was now time to kiss the bride. They had an agreement not to have any physical contact, but now Jowy changed his mind. He pulled up the veil and marveled at her delicate face. _She is beautiful...and she is mine_ He pulled her close and wrapped his arm around her waist as he lowered his face. Jilia, surprised at this gesture, went stiff and her eyes widened when she felt his lips on her. Was Jowy trying to convince everyone that this wedding was not a fake one? But their agreement...Jilia's heart softened as Jowy deepened his kiss. She was his and he was hers, even if it was only for that moment. Relenting to her desire, she returned the kiss and savored the moment of their bonding.

Her lips felt soft and tasted sweet. Truthfully speaking, Jowy had never been this close to a female before. In his seventeen years, he never had a girlfriend, as he was busy training under Genkaku. Sure, many girls asked him out, but he was not really interested. Nanami? He loved her, but as a close friend, a sister even. Jowy recalled when Riou and him were younger, there was once when they had tried to see over the wall of a restricted mansion. He saw a pretty dark-haired girl playing with a dog in a high-class garden. He remembered her face well. Years had passed and Jowy could never forget that young girl's face. He would have been overjoyed to see her again if only he was not going to be executed. She was in a carriage back then, a look of sorrow on her gentle face. When Viktor and Flik rescued them, he had the thought of going back and take her with him, but he let that remain a thought. Yet now, here he was, holding the only girl whom he had thought of all these years, only to have her wed him for politics. Life is ironic, isn't it? If fate has a human form, Jowy would think him as a cruel, sarcastic being taking pleasure in toying with people's emotions. 

"Excellent! Now, let's prepare for the feast tonight! Come, Jilia and my new brother-in-law! Let us enjoy such a joyous day!"

Luca's loud and forceful voice broke the spell, and the two newly weds broke apart rather hastily. Both could be seen blushing, but Jilia felt like a fool. Luca was obviously impatient to go kill something and soon the hall was empty, leaving the two walking out _really_ slowly. Both seemed to have returned to their composure, the hot embrace turned to cold linked arms. Jowy felt her response, but that did not mean that she loved him, so he just remained silent, holding his arm out in formality. Jilia was torn apart inside with both joy and sorrow, for she did not know what that kiss meant. She felt the tiniest spark of hope, only to be washed away by doubts. She feared that her heart might break into nothingness. Didn't she marry Jowy for his ambition? Yes, that was the only reason for this marriage. She meant nothing to him and Jilia could not do anything about it now, but she still loved him. Nothing mattered now. She knew she had married the man she loved and that was enough.

______________

_  
Have you ever closed your eyes   
And dreamt that they were there   
And all you can do is wait   
For the day when they will care   
Have you ever loved somebody_

______________

Two months had passed since their wedding, and a month had passed since her brother's funeral. His body was never found, thus a proper burial could not be done. As sad as Jilia was, she wasn't surprised. Now Jowy was King of Highland and she was Queen by status. Almost every night she would spend alone in her room, surrounded by emptiness. She would have wonderful dreams of staying in a hut with Jowy, enjoying life until they grow old, only to wake to cruel reality. Now that all her kin were gone, Jowy was her only family left. Though she felt many a time to run away for she was no longer needed, her resolve dissipated when she met him. Rarely a night he would enter her room, only to chat for a while before leaving again. The topics discussed were usually formalities, he never exposed himself to her and she kept her dignity. All her servants and handmaidens felt pity for their queen. She used to be lively and now she has turned quiet and sad. 

There was only one source of joy other than kind words from Jowy, and that was Pilika. One day Jowy returned with a child at hand. Horrified at the thought that she could have been his, Jilia just stared at Pilika. All hope of gaining Jowy's love evaporated as she saw how loving he was to the rather emotionless girl. However, Jowy had moved to Jilia and passed Pilika over to her, looking at her with trusted eyes,

"This is Pilika. Her emotions had been sealed when her parents were killed. She is very dear to me and now I entrust her to you. Take good care of her, Jilia."

How she wished he would say the same for her. _She is very dear to me...you are very dear to me..._Jilia smiled sadly,

"Yes, my lord."

Since Pilika entered her life, Jilia felt herself devoting her feelings to another being, and this one returned her feelings. Pilika showed little signs of improvement expression-wise, but one could tell that she loved Jilia dearly. She was pampered with wonderful clothes and toys, and soon she was her cheerful (silent) self again. She would cling onto Jilia's skirt all day, only when her beloved Uncle Jowy appeared would she let go and dash towards him. He would pick her up and swing her around, looking as happy as a child. How Jilia envied Pilika sometimes. _If only I could just run and hold him in my arms..._She noticed ever since Pilika's appearance, Jowy had visited more often and most of the time he had seemed happy, though his sadness would return every time he got up to leave. He had spoken more words to Jilia and had even spent time walking with her in the garden while Pilika had a nap. Jilia knew Pilika was drawing them closer, thus she could sometimes be a bit over-protective of the little girl. She would shower her and tuck her to bed. Occasionally Jowy would pop in and tell Pilika a story before bed, and Jilia watched in bliss. It was like a real family, and though her love could not reach Jowy, it would reach him through Pilika. 

______________

_What do I gotta do to get you in my arms, baby   
What do I gotta say to get to your heart   
To make you understand   
How I need you next to me   
Gotta get you in my world   
Cuz baby I can't sleep_

_Have you ever loved somebody so much   
It makes you cry   
Have you ever needed something so bad   
You can't sleep at night   
Have you ever tried to find the words   
But they don't come out right   
Have you ever, have you ever   
  
Have you ever_

______________

_No...this can't be happening!_ Jowy had just asked her to bring Pilika and run. His best friend had arrived in L'Renouille to fight him. Jowy just told her to escape to Harmonia where he had prepared a place for them to stay. So he had prepared for this day. He would rather fight his childhood friend and die in his arms rather than escape with her. While Jowy was saying the final farewell to Pilika, Jilia stood in terror. After all this, after all she endured, only to be sent off leaving her love to die? 

Pilika, too, felt heartbroken. She sensed her beloved uncle would be facing danger, which was why he sent Auntie Jilia to run away with her. She felt a dread creeping up as her eyes suddenly filled with tears. Pilika tried to speak, but she could not and she blamed herself for not being to express herself. She thought that if she spoke and pleaded, Uncle Jowy would come along with her, but no words came out. Tears of desperation fell as Jowy pulled her up to have one last look at her. Jowy's eyes filled with sorrow as he wiped her tears. He was glad that Pilika was slowly recovering, but not being able to be there when she could call him 'Uncle Jowy' again depresses him. Hugging and kissing her goodbye, Jowy placed her down and asked her to prepare herself for her journey. There was not much time left and if Riou did not get him, the True Beast Rune would. Pilika clung to Jowy's breeches as if for dear life, but Jowy gently persuaded her to go. 

After Pilika exited the room with a face full of tears, Jowy's full attention fell on Jilia. She was still standing where she had been five minutes ago, with the look of disbelief turning to grief. Jilia was given the task to take care of Pilika and for that she would escape. If not, she would have stayed with him until the very end. For once, pride left her and everything that had been bottled inside poured out. She moved towards Jowy and he placed his hands on her shaking shoulders. That was the most intimate gesture he had done since their wedding. Jowy tried to calm her down, but to no avail. Just when she was feeling like a family they had to part. Life was not fair! Jowy comforted her with empty promises that he would be fine, he would catch up later, but Jilia knew better. He tightened his grip on her and asked her to leave immediately. Jilia was helpless to the end, so she went for the door slowly, in misery. 

She could hold it no longer. She may not ever see the man she loved, ever! Turning around she lifted her skirt and ran to her one true love, just like Pilika had done. Surprisingly, just as she dreamed, Jowy wrapped his arms around her almost instantly after she hugged. Jilia was crying softly in his arms, shuddering slightly. She would have noticed the tiny flame of hope in her heart burning again if she was not so filled with sorrow.

"Jilia..."

Jowy felt lost when he saw her go. He wished he had done more than just gripping her shoulders, but if he did, he did not know if he could let go. Jilia running back to him had triggered something dormant in him. He let his feelings go and listened to what his heart and body told him to do. He loved her. No matter how much he denied it, no matter how big a burden he held, he knew it had always been so. He held Jilia as tight as possible, afraid she would just slip away. Jilia must have some feelings for him, otherwise she would not have turned back. This made Jowy's heart ache more. If she had, indeed, truly loved him all this time, he would never forgive himself for hurting her so. Not caring what the consequences may be, Jowy whispered as he smoothed Jilia's hair,

"I love you, Jilia."

Jilia could not believe her ears. Perhaps the noise outside made her hear things, but that could not be. He had directed those words to her, and her alone. More tears fell, this time tears of joy. _So he loves me..._ Jowy did not wait for an answer. He lifted Jilia's wet face and kissed her tears. By the time he gazed at her Jilia's face was a sodden red. _She still is beautiful..._ Touching her face, Jowy lowered his head for a farewell kiss. This was the second time they ever kissed, and this time, Jilia did not intend to pull away so quickly. They held each other for the longest time, each filled with love, joy and sorrow. However, Jilia's plan was fouled by explosions not too far below. Apparently the final battle had begun. There was no more time. Once again Jowy cursed the merciless fate for not being able to stay by her side any longer.

It took every ounce of will and logic to pull Jowy out of the embrace. Jilia knew it was time and their hands held for the longest time as she moved away before they fell limply on either's sides. Both their eyes held love and sorrow, but only Jilia had joy mixed in it. She had not yet told Jowy how she felt. Stopping on the doorway, Jilia turned around with determination in her eyes. Jowy stood there surprised as she declared,

"I am Jilia Atreides, the loving wife of Jowy Atreides! We have sworn an oath to spend the rest of our lives together and you will need to take care of Pilika and me. Promise me, my love, that you will return to us and fulfill that oath."

One could tell that Jilia was refraining from crying really hard, for her hands grabbed the fabric of her skirt so hard her knuckles turned white. Jowy was speechless as his wrenched heart was now full of joy. Though they were meant to be separated, fate could not stop them from loving each other. His eyes danced in happiness, even if for a brief moment, as he answered,

"I promise."

Unlike many of his other (empty) promises, Jowy meant it this time. Even though he knew he would die here, he knew his heart and soul would always be with them.

______________

_Have you ever loved somebody so much   
It makes you cry   
Have you ever needed something so bad   
You can't sleep at night   
Have you ever tried to find the words   
But they don't come out right   
Have you ever, have you ever   
  
Have you ever_

______________

Jilia was cooking in the kitchen of the hut Jowy had prepared for her. Harmonia was not involved with the war of the East, thus they were safe there. Pilika had recovered from her sorrow, though every now and then she would look in the direction of Highland, expecting her Uncle Jowy to appear. Jilia sometimes joined her in her wait.

A month had passed with news of Highland falling to the State, but no news of the great Jowy Atreides Blight. Jilia did not want to live her life of hope and disappointment. Instead, she was happy with the fact that the man she loved had loved her too. She would never forget the promise he made, thus all she could do now was to try to help Pilika through.

"Pilika!"

Jilia went out to call the little girl, whom she has treated as her daughter, in for lunch. Pilika was looking at empty space again, though it was not Highland, but a bush outside the fence. Puzzled, Jilia stopped for a second and noticed the bush shook, as though something, or someone, had been hiding there. Before she could move, a gentle breeze swept through the garden, taking Pilika's hat with it. Jilia smiled and returned to the small house. The wind had carried a message for her.

_I promise..._

______________

  
_Oh, Have you ever_

______________

Fin~  
  



End file.
